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vintage-kisses:

Sometimes I really don’t feel like existing like not in a suicidal way but I just wish there was a way of pausing life so that I could sleep for a few weeks and figure some stuff out and then not have to feel guilty for missing loads of stuff because really no time had passed at all

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timecurry:

hellohelbig:

justindonuts:

lets-get-krunk:

"I really don’t want to shower but I want to be clean" an autobiography

"Now that I’m in the shower I really dont wanna get out" a sequel

"Now that I’m out, I don’t want to put on clothes" the spin-off

"I’m sitting here in my towel and I must have showered 2 hours ago" the self help booklet

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  • 6 hours ago
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mishasminions:

I LIVE IN A WORLD WHERE "YOU LITTLE SHIT" IS A TERM OF ENDEARMENT AND IT’S MAGICAL

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bussykiller:

seeing your crush like 
image

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soufflesandbowties:

50% of my jokes are self deprecating and 50% are self congratulatory like i’ll say “wow its hot in here…. just like me” and 5 seconds later point at a trash can and say “me”

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anneboleyns:

"but officer they were fucking with my clique"

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